The Art of Confidence

It’s getting dressed when you may not be in the mood, it’s looking in the mirror and observing and acknowledging your favorite feature, it’s not only blasting and singing Lizzo’s Truth Hurts to the top of your lungs – but believing it too. That’s the thing about confidence; it consists of various things and requires just as many. But with whom much is required, much more will be rewarded. Confidence contains magic from a light that can only be sparked internally. So, how lit are you?

There are certain people who naturally possess and exhibit the social butterfly trait. These particular individuals workrooms effortlessly, control conversations with ease, and politely put the “extra” in extrovert. Then you have those beloveds who weren’t always in possession of the gift of gab. They worked, healed, and developed the confidence and personal attributes needed in order to become successful in social engagement. I’ve encountered these types of people – watched in awe as they’d glide throughout a room with ease and exude an immense level of confidence. Oh, what courageous energy it must take in order to maintain yours, all while engaging and intertwining with various other types. Then you have your gems whose spirits are a bit more tamed. They don’t quite approach situations or people with assertiveness or aggression. Matter fact, they don’t approach at all; I’m all too familiar with this energy as well. Understand, it’s not that these people aren’t interesting or that they aren’t some of the most amazing people in the world that you should be more than elated to align yourself with. These people are even equipped with the attributes needed to successfully work those same rooms occupied by those social butterflies. The difference with these types of people is that they are aware of their magic and they aren’t afraid to humbly revel in it. Now please don’t misunderstand my intentions or my message. This is by no means an act of negative critique or judgment – its more like a slew of encouragement because I’m well acquainted with these

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types of feelings. I understand these feelings because I have coped, healed, and grown from them. I know what it’s like to have your fire dimmed, yet you still feel it burning inside. I know how it feels to exhaust yourself mentally from constantly having to uplift yourself due to self-doubt playing a prominent role in your daily thought regimen. I know how it feels to stand in a room full of people, and feel invisible. I want to provide support in changing that narrative. I wish to encourage those beautiful spirits who are yearning tobefree,that'stheonlythingtofear,notallowingyoursoultoshine. Thisgoesouttothosewhostruggle with social interactions, and who – whether knowingly or unknowingly – lack the full and complete confidence of their amazing selves. This is for the beautiful spirits who have unfortunately encountered such trauma, that they are left reeling in a sea of insecurities and self-destruction due to simply lacking the faith to know that they are light and that they have the strength to shine.

There’s always a silver lining in the clouds, however. You see the beautiful thing about humility is how unaware you are of your light – that everyone else easily sees. For some of us, we have convinced ourselves that by staying low in the shadows, or by dimming the light that we are, somehow, we avoid rejection, judgment, and heartbreak. We don’t wish to offend anyone with our natural aura of grace and strive tirelessly to avoid any and all ridicule. There’s tmagic that we not only possess but feel categorical. We long for genuine connections, mellow conversations, and the chance to flourish like the social butterflies that we know we are. So why is it so hard? I truly believe there’s an art to confidence and assurance. If you think about it, most of our anxiety is centered around change, which brings about uncertainty. It’s when we’re unsure of the reaction or result, that we decide to remain stagnant or hide even out of fear. The same applies to ourselves. Despite the unfortunate things that we may have encountered, it’s up to us to remember who we are, and the magic we possess. Now please hear me well, this is far from an easy task. To pick yourself up, after being made to feel extremely low – or attempting to shine a light, when it has been constantly dimmed can feel all but possible; but it is. The universe will only administer what we sow. How can we expect people to value our worth when we refuse to allow it to be displayed? We have all experienced devastating encounters that left us shattered, however, the difference was that some decided that no matter how dark the world got, it would never affect their light. Not only is it disrespectful to our creator, and our support system – but when you choose to hide your value, you eliminate the possibility of sharing and being a blessing. You never know who needs your energy. As with a size of a mustard seed; that’s all the courage and faith you need in yourself to exude a positive ripple effect in your energy. It’s in those moments that you feel weak, that you must highlight your greatest strength. It’s when your “flaws” begin to take hostage of your mental capacity, that you must think of your best attribute and channel that energy. It’s when we feel low and alone, that we must remember that we are truly someone special and that we are needed. Confidence is what cheers us on when we look to what appears to be an empty stand. It all starts within. Now for some, this will be far from easy to obtain; for as I stated before – there’s comfort in familiarity. However, remember that nothing great rarely comes from your comfort zone. We can’t expect the world to view us in a way that we don’t even see ourselves – but at the same time, we must also remember that what people think of us should never matter; complex right? – wrong. The art of confidence requires awareness, courage, and strength. Be so aware of who you are, that despite the knowledge and evidence of people’s opinions; your value is still unaffected. Allow courage to take over and know that you are worthy and you belong. And exude the strength that you know you truly possess to conquer your fears, goals, and obstacles. You have what it takes to be who you want to be and to shine a light effortlessly wherever you go. Remember there’s an art to confidence – but you are a masterpiece.

Written By: Jessica Payne @_gojessiigo